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I have disapointed my famiy
I have disappointed my family. My dad lies awake at night because of my decisions…
Two years ago, I decided to get a divorce from a marriage which I could label as ‘a happy marriage’. We had a great life together, we were a team. We have a beautiful son, our house was perfect. Nothing to complain about.
But still, I got this feeling I needed to be alone, to go on my own. To explore my destiny, which was different from the life I was living.
It was not my husband holding me back; it was something in me.
Why? I didn’t understand it and don’t understand it still, but I FEEL it.
And my family didn’t understand me. They really supported me, I really felt that. But I was disappointing them in a way.
And then 2 years later, last December… I decided to quit my paid job to pursue my heart again: creating my own business at a moment I didn’t have any income, only my savings.
It was not the job; I just got this urge inside of me, to go on my own. To explore my destiny, which was different from the life I was living.
Why? I didn’t understand it and don’t understand it still, but I FEEL it.
And my family doesn’t understand me. They support me, I really feel that. But I know I am disappointing them in a way.
My parents just told me again that he couldn’t sleep last night, laying awake worrying about my financial situation, my future.
My parents were raised with the belief that you have to work hard to earn any money. That if things can go wrong, they will.
My dad warns me that no one can be trusted.
I refuse to live like that as it’s not according to my own inner beliefs.
I trust everyone. Every person is a good person deep inside them.
I don’t have to work hard for the Universe to take care of me.
I want to live my life according to the deepest feeling inside of me, to be my true self, despite what anyone else thinks. It sounds so simple, but is the hardest thing to do.
The “only thing” I need to do is to completely trust myself that I deserve everything there is in this world. And everyone else in this world deserves that too.
I truly believe there’s an abundance of everything, but it starts with the abundance in SELF-LOVE.
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With my ‘scarcity-mindset’ family background, which goes way back in my family lineage, I just realized today that I still have to overcome this final hurdle of eliminating my deeply ingrained self-limiting beliefs about my worthiness.
Only then will the customers and international speaking opportunities come rolling in so quickly that I can’t keep up with them.
That is what ‘manifestation’ is all about: not defining what you want, but knowing what you have to get rid of, what to let go of, in order to be able to receive.
Are you willing to face what’s holding you back?
Are you worth it all?
Comment below or send me an e-mail jolanda@innerreveal.nl